Remembering one year on
I could not stop thinking about Bianca Couch on the anniversary of her disappearance. I felt particularly heartsore for her mother because this is the cruellest punishment – the uncertainty must drain the hope out of her. So on this day I hoped that she’d find renewed strength and have the unwavering ability to never give up!
The twentieth of December may have passed without much ado to you and I but to a family a piece is missing and their lives remain incomplete until that piece is safely returned to where it belongs.
Wherever you are Bianca know that there are people waiting for your safe return!
Sweet Revenge
So I’ve been watching a series called Revenge and for the most part I couldn’t figure if I loved it or hated it. I must admit I admired the research and effort put in by the lead character, Emily. I absolutely disliked the fact that I often found myself supporting her evil schemes. I really worried that it may show exactly what type of character I truly am. I’ve long-held the view that people who wrong you should be forgiven but occasionally in my life I’ve dreamed elaborate plans to get back at people who had wronged me. Perhaps this is why in a sick kind of way I really admired Emily because she did what I only dreamed.
The downside of a vengeful persons life as demonstrated by Emily is the loneliness and feeling of complete emptiness. As the curtain came down on series 1, the sight of her heartbroken and being no closer to being free from a life of vengeance just proved how futile payback can be. I’m not suggesting that wrongdoers should be let off but their punishment should be left to those in authority if they’ve broken a law. Personal offence is a seperate issue of which I’m sure most of us have had to deal with it. How we deal with this says volumes about us.
There is nothing sweet about revenge it just leaves you bitter not better. Forgive, forget and move on!
“If I cannot tolerate my life I may have to go sooner”
These are the words of a completely paralysed gentleman following a stroke. He has made his request known by communicating via a computer controlled by his eyes. He is presently in a legal bid to demand the right to be killed. He is supported by his wife who is his carer. Along with other members of his family who all strongly feel that he should be given the choice to die.
It is such a sensitive topic and my heart goes out to this man who had an active life and is now trapped in a body that will not respond no matter how much he wills it. Death is just so permanent though and once the decision to end his life is taken there are no retakes.
The courts are adamant that to legalise this type of legislation is equal to giving murder the go ahead which will always be a crime no matter the reason. Personally I feel that the family should be giving this man all the reasons he needs to stay alive and by supporting his bid it seems they are keen to be rid of him. Just my thoughts!
Here comes trouble
Funny how our parents always warned us about choosing friends wisely particularly during adolescence. My mother always said choose friends who have a vision for their future and are not just caught up in the moment. I must admit it was a tough to imagine that anything else mattered than being popular. So some thirty years later I can see what she meant. Popularity can only get you so far but planning for your future is always going to benefit you.
Sadly for some people the need to be popular and centre of attention never grows old. There is nothing worse than an adolescent attention seeking adult. You just want to shout ‘Can you grow up already!’ Of late I’ve been seeing the need to limit my interaction with these kind of individuals because no matter what you say it always ends up being about them. I refuse to be absorbed into somebody else’s little world. My life is way too busy raising my daughters to be caught up with people who have no desire to evolve.
The time has come for me to walk away from troublemakers, bullies and self seeking individuals. It seems choosing friends is a lifelong challenge. Thankfully for the most part I’ve made relatively good decisions. Friendship doesn’t have a recipe for instant success but I’m certain it shouldn’t take a lifetime to develop lasting and rewarding ones. I’m so grateful for all the amazing people in my life!
Dirty rotten scoundrels
So yesterday I made my way back to the food bank after quite a long break. It was an extremely busy shift which was further complicated when a support agency worker who visited for the first time had her car window smashed and her intern (second day on the job!) had her handbag stolen during the incident! I must admit at that moment all the emotions I felt when my car was stolen with my bag safely placed in the boot came flooding back and that incident was in 2004!
I remembered how clear thinking individuals came to my rescue instructing me on what to do to ensure the further safety of my belongings. If you’ve lived through this type of incident then you know the avalanche of questions you ask yourself. Should have or shouldn’t haves top the list and you just wish you could do things differently. After the shock comes the anger and absolute disbelief that people can be so callous and uncaring. While you remain eternally grateful that you were not physically harmed being told that everything is replaceable does nothing at the time to comfort you. For a while after the incident there’s a kind of fear that attempts to paralyse you and you fear repercussions from the perpetrators who have your details. In time you do find peace and fight to win your freedom of movement back.
After many calls, texts, emails and form-filling you have all your personal effects replaced. In the case of the young girl yesterday she felt like her life had been stolen and I could identify with how she felt after all you never imagine that you will be a target. It was a painful reminder that we live in a fallen world and we have to think like criminals to beat them at their game. It is terrible when bad things happen to good people BUT evil will never triumph even when it seems it has won!
Longing for freedom
It’s been quite a while now that I’ve been very interested in the dynamics of human trafficking. After attending an information evening and being exposed to the vastness of this evil I must admit I was very overwhelmed.
I heard a mom share from experience what had happened to her daughter but her message was simple – evil cannot be allowed to triumph!
There was so much to think about and I kept reminding myself that I don’t have to do everything I just have to something. Humans were never intended for sale but sadly the few statistics show just what a high price this trade is and not just monetary value. The effects are deep. The key word to me is freedom and it is a basic human right to have freedom to choose how you live your life.
I take my hat off to the many people and agencies who fight tirelessly to bring freedom to the oppressed. Whoever you are, wherever you are we can join in this fight for freedom for men, women and children. Will you join the fight?
The truth about pillow fights
They really do seem like fun at the time. Sadly somebody has to clean that mess!
The power of the tongue is a lot like a pillow you see. Keep it in its case and you’re sure to maintain control. Now I’ve had a few moments in my life where I’ve spread my feathers and found it impossible to gather them. If you’re one of those individuals who makes the best speeches when you’re angry I’ve no doubt you know what I mean.
I’ve hated those moments trying to catch words that are as sharp as nails and knowing the damage has been done. Sorry never seems enough and it never is when you’re trying to clean up a mess which could’ve been avoided if you just had the power to hold that horrible little tongue.
The way you respond after such an incident says way too much about you as an individual. Well I’m holding my tongue and hopefully the feather flying decreases with maturity!
Freedom fighters
Have you heard from Johannesburg? I watched this rather thought-provoking documentary and it was a really good reminder of the many men and woman who put their lives on the line to bring so many oppressed South Africans to political freedom and many other social liberties.
This is my shout out to Oliver Tambo who fought relentlessly to get the voices of the downtrodden heard in Europe and America. After a lifetime of campaigning for an end to apartheid and the right to vote he died a year before the first democratic election.
There are those who fight for freedom and those who secure and celebrate that freedom. South Africa has come a long way from the days of the state of emergency and the group areas act. There is still so much more to be done. ”After climbing a great hill, one only finds that there are many more hills to climb” Nelson Mandela
Princess diaries
I’ve been following the story of a Londoner Katie Piper who was the victim of an acid attack by an ex boyfriend. He has since been prosecuted and jailed. Fortunately for her she had access to ground breaking treatments for burn victims. Since the attack she has undergone over one hundred operations. Katie is well and truly on the road to recovery. I’ve no doubt it will take much longer for her psychological wounds to catch up to the physical ones.
Domestic violence is so rife in modern-day society. It’s not just common people who fall victim to physical, verbal and psychological abuse. Since the Grammy awards and a win by Chris Brown the story of his vicious attack on his ex girlfriend has resurfaced. He was prosecuted and given a lengthy probation sentence. In my opinion it was a lenient sentence. He should have served jail time like other criminals do!
There is never an excuse for violence of any kind. Communication is the key.
Relationships are so complicated because they can bring you so much pleasure and as much pain. A certain level of maturity is needed and it seems quite clear that break ups cause some people to become irrational.
We all deserve to be treated like royalty. We’re too special to be treated any less. I don’t believe in fairy tales but I do believe you can choose the kind of life you want. Then perhaps the happily ever after will follow.
We’re all in this together
People often speak about the suffering and plight of the less fortunate. You may not have money or other resources to save the whole world. The truth is that the hungry and oppressed will always be among us. However, that does not mean we shouldn’t try to make a difference.
Take a look around your community and see where you can make a difference. Then go and make a difference!
Finders Keepers
Yesterday my husband lost his wallet on a flight from Ireland. The panic that followed was quite tangible. Having lost a purse before it is quite crazy how your mind goes into overdrive. Finding a starting point becomes the biggest challenge. I guess the key is to do damage control which means contacting the bank!
When my husband contacted the bank to his utter surprise somebody had called in to report his wallet had been found. He was very relieved and after getting the location of the kind soul we made our way to a hotel to pick it up. It turned out to be the passenger who sat next to him!
Glad to know there are still wonderful people out there who make the effort for perfect strangers just because they can!
The hands of time
At the moment of your birth your whole life lies before you. An empty canvas waiting for you to make your mark with life’s many experiences. Sometimes the art can appear very abstract with way too many unanswered questions. I guess the trick of this life is finding a way to leave the past behind, live in the present and plan for a tomorrow that may never come. Cherishing each day because you may never meet chances and opportunities again. Moments forever lost in time.
Recently I’ve been forced to face with my own mortality. Every now and again an untimely death gets me re-evaluating the way I’m living my life. When you’re young you somehow feel you going to live forever. I’m not suggesting living in fear of death but it certainly sheds some light on the things we place importance on. Particularly the things we cannot take with us when we die. Unfortunately this world we live in requires us to make a living and support ourselves and our families. Finding the balance in giving priority to people who count as opposed to things.
Ever so often I get fed up with being a stay at home mom and I very quickly realise that my girls will be all grown up in the blink of an eye and these moments will be gone forever. So wherever you find yourself in this life just make the absolute most of good and bad situations because nothing lasts forever. Nothing in this life is certain except death.
The seven Dwarfs
I’ve been watching a documentary on the lives and experiences of seven dwarves who live and work together. The more I watched the clearer it became that no matter how different we are our challenges are often the same.
We all have this need to be loved, accepted and appreciated. While their differences may be very obvious to the naked eye in reality whether publicly or privately we have this desire to be “normal” in many aspects.
The challenge for me is to accept myself the way I am and to give both friends and strangers the same courtesy. Having young children often means having to find the best way to explain the differences we see in each other. Respect for each other goes a very long way in this life.
The lesson I learnt from these seven people was to be the best you can be because people will always have their opinions about you! We hear this often but it’s sometimes worth hearing the reminder and taking the challenge to be your best head on!
Liberation for Libya
Tonight Libya is on the brink of freedom according to the latest media reports. So the world is watching with bated breath to see the outcome.
Freedom comes with great responsibility and my only hope is that the Libyan people are indeed prepared for the challenge! After years of tyranny under a leader they referred to as a brother and friend the wheels of his heavy-handed leadership are now turning against him. The same way he usurped leadership is the exact way it’s being taken from him.
No doubt it is a very scary time for Libyans at home and abroad. It’s been said that change is as good as a holiday but the Libyan people have had change before and it turned out to be a disaster. Hoping for speedy change and peace for all the people of Libya.
End times
Now I don’t consider myself a sceptic but watching the news tonight really made me wonder what direction the world is moving. Of course we now know that the recent prediction for the world to end did not pan out.
Greece is in crisis and the value of money is at a rather critical stage!
Then there was the story of the starving Somalians which really broke my heart. A mother should never have to see her child starving and have absolutely no inclination where to find help. I really hate that in the world there are so many people wasting while others struggle just to get the basics!
I guess the poor will always be among us but it doesn’t hurt to do the best we can to help the less fortunate. After all sharing is caring.
Kiss and tell
Watching a political debate and can’t believe that thirty minutes have been spent discussing an injunction.Namely the naming and shaming of Ryan Giggs! Sadly I think it’s time for people to realise that all humans have clay feet even very talented ones. I guess the sooner me and others like me who read the tabloids with a keen interest in other people’s affairs refrain from doing so the press will always feel the need to feed this interest. Sadly the law is a double-edged sword which says we have the right to privacy but that right ends where the next individuals right to freedom of speech begins! Ryan Giggs has been outed as a common scumbag who was willing to part with £150 000 to keep his good image intact. Well Mr.Giggs I hope you manage to clean up this mess and hang onto your wife and kids like Terry and Rooney before you!
X marks the spot
Local elections were held across South Africa today. It was interesting to read about various people’s thoughts and opinions about political parties and their agendas. Yay for democracy but with this freedom there should undoubtedly be responsibility and accountability!
We need to be the change we want to see…politicians cannot not meet all of our expectations. I will instill in my daughters the need to be good law-abiding citizens.Further than that they alone will determine their future.Right now their future looks very bright:)
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