Life, Love, and Passports


Momma’s arms

Today I got ‘that’ call from school that I always dread. It went something like ‘your little one is poorly and would like to go home’
Our girls have general good health so when these calls are made I actually go into panic mode. I can’t get to school quick enough to pick up my precious cargo.

On arriving at the school I found myself explaining that she was totally fine when she left home. I’m not exactly sure why I felt the need to defend my actions. There was nothing to defend it was simple she went to school fell ill and needed to go home! It was just another reminder of the fear of being judged for my parenting skills.

After all the panic and guilt I realised that all my girl wanted was to lie on the couch with her momma and be told she’ll be better soon.
There is no substitute for a mothers touch. I do love being a mother and it’s always rewarding when my children find comfort in my arms.


The Missing

The last three weeks I’ve been watching this series. While I’m one for drama and suspense I get really freaked out when I watch stuff that’s so real I’ve no doubt it could happen. Having said that and being a glutton for punishment I continue to watch with one eye opened and with intermittent breathing.

This series takes us on a journey a frightening journey of a young British boy who is abducted in France while in the care of his father. Needless to say that is every parents nightmare I know it’s mine. After all I’m the crazy mother who keeps shouting for her children when out and about. After a near fatal breakdown I hear ‘I’m right behind you mummy’
This is why I’m enduring this torturous series I’m waiting for a fictional boy to be found.

I’ve been on an emotional rollercoaster ride and in pain for all the families who have to live through this. These precious people young and old cannot be forgotten and it’s up to us to keep them in the forefront of people’s minds. Unfortunately the media have a short attention span and the lost and taken are quickly forgotten.

Bianca Couch you are not forgotten. It’s almost three years since you disappeared without a trace. Your family and friends have not stopped hoping for your return.

And the beat goes on…

Being a mother is a rather tough ask at the best of times.
Most days are filled with mundane tasks. Overseeing meals, teeth brushing (my least favourite!), the school run and other countless activities depending on the day of the week.

There’s the constant refereeing in my house which is a skill very quickly developed when you have three strong willed daughters all with the need to be right all of the time. Do not underestimate how exhausting that is. Peace is usually restored when they are all sent to different spaces in the house.

I love being a mother (most days) and some people (clueless ones) will judge me for saying that. If moms were honest and avoided trying to appear invincible we’d be a huge support to each other. Imagine a world where we didn’t have to pretend and just said the way things were without fear of being judged or appearing as a failure. I’m blessed to have friends who I can just inform that ‘I’m fed up’. I’m always guaranteed support and words of wisdom.

Today was one of those days where I felt that I must be doing something right. It always feels so rewarding to get positive feedback about my offspring because it fills me with pride.

Motherhood is a maze of experiences and emotions. No two days are the same each one filled with twists and turns and occasional dead ends. We’re challenged constantly and learning as we go along…on the job training!

Heart of the matter

If I had to describe my attitude in times of trouble for the most part I’d say I take it in my stride.
More recently though I find myself taking longer to shake the unpleasantness off.

I’ve had to take stock of my emotions in recent days which hasn’t been easy. In retrospect I realise that stuff happens people get hurt and we move on…except it’s getting harder to move on.
If we truly consider others feelings we’d think twice about the things we say and do. You’d assume that thought process would be second nature when we conduct our daily affairs with people.

The challenge for me right now is to not just value myself and my emotions but to think of the way I treat others too!

Just keep swimming

I decided to start swimming regularly earlier this year. I’ve always enjoyed swimming not just in pools and beaches but filthy dams, slimy rivers and just standing under the odd waterfall! Any opportunity to swim was grasped with both hands. I have wonderful memories of my friends and I just frolicking for the heck of it.

My swimming schedule has been a rather challenging experience mainly because I’d set targets for myself and really wanted to keep up ( it’s not always easy!) not just the frequency but the quality as well. For me the best way was lane swimming and I’ve learnt not just to push through time barriers but more about myself as an individual.

As a person who could quite easily exist without rules lane swimming requires me to go in one direction only. It also requires me to keep moving. Quite a challenge but I think I’ve kind of mastered that.

Being me I occasionally decide to venture outside of lane times. At those informal sessions I tend to swim zig zag because I can. I also have regular breaks and admire the surroundings (can they ban those awful little trunks please!)

Swimming has taught me so many valuable lessons. I can do whatever I set my mind to. Like in life it’s easier to compare yourself to weaker people and that may make you feel like a better person. While I started out relishing overtaking slower swimmers I now target stronger swimmers and try to keep up though I should add I’m not always successful. There’ll always be somebody in life who is fitter, faster and more fabulous than you’ll ever be. It’s all about being the best you can be .

We all set different challenges at some point in our lives, sometimes we lose and other times we win. I’m learning to be realistic about goals I set but in the meanwhile I’ll just keep swimming!

Getting my groove back…I think!

Wow! It’s hard to believe that it’s been more than six months since I shared my ramblings. What’s even stranger is that I didn’t miss writing until just a few days ago. I’ve glanced through a few posts and I’m reminded now of what a great escape it is.

Life has just carried on as it does. Summer has come and gone. The Christmas lights have been switched on. The days will be crisp, dark and wet for the foreseeable future.

So what’s changed while I’ve been hibernating? I’m still a stay at home mother to my three children even though they’re all at school full time – weird I know.
My days are mostly filled with swimming and baking because if you bake you should swim or do anything that makes you feel less guilty about all the cake you eat!
I’m still in good old England living the dream (or a beautiful nightmare!).

I look forward to sharing more of my
experiences as a wife, mother and legal alien!

Oh David Moyes I do not wish to be you…today!

The world and Manchester United fans woke up to the news that their carefully chosen manager has been sacked. The man destined to continue the Ferguson legacy has failed to deliver. Personally I can’t help but feel sorry for him well actually not. Like many Goodison faithful and anti United lot I am slyly laughing my football head off.

Talk about big shoes to fill he didn’t have a fighting chance. He has spent most of the season finding Sir Alex’s shoes. I bet Moyes is now sitting barefoot wondering what’s happened to his own shoes. Roberto Martinez has filled them good Sir over and above expectations which must be hurting you right now.

Has Moyes been a victim of the old Trafford hype? They convinced him to leave a thriving team by getting Sir Alex to give him the golden nod. After all if Sir Alex says you’re the best surely he can’t be wrong. Apparently not! Fact is whoever comes along now will seem successful.

They say you shouldn’t live with regret but alas it will take a while for Moyes to live this decision down. Success is very rarely ready made it takes hard work which he more than provided with Everton. Is this a severe case of walking away prematurely? You should’ve been stepping in now. Oh David Moyes I do not wish to be you today!

Is Moyes the only person who didn’t realise he was destined to fail? If the Red Devils finished anything but top of the premier league it would be a failure. He should’ve hung out at least one more season – this season. It’s going to hurt real bad if Everton qualify for the champions league now. Oh David Moyes I do not wish to be you today!

Tooth fairy wars

I have got to be the worst tooth fairy in the world. In the back of my mind I want my children to believe in the magic of the tooth fairy who coughs up £1.50 every time they lose a tooth. On one occasion it was a generous payment of £10 because dad and mom fairy had no loose change!
The other part of my practical brain asks why am I teaching them such nonsense but because it’s expected of me by society I’m under pressure to perform. However, this does not apply to Father Christmas for he has never existed in our home. This curbs unrealistic expectations from dad and moms toy factory.

This morning I woke up with the biggest jolt because it was second night running that I’d forgotten to magically remove a little incisor which was hidden under a piece of paper marked ‘tooth fairy’ next to the television.
Now before you judge me this was the second tooth in about ten days. The first one was a breeze because my dear friend reminded me before I went to sleep and boy was I grateful for her text.

Today I’ve been saved by the skin of my own teeth because surely the tooth fairy could not possibly forget two nights in a row. My excuse yesterday was the tooth wasn’t under the original note and because we’ve moved house they sometimes need help. There was no room for error and yet it happened again.
I’ve now removed the tooth and parted with another £1.50 although my dear little Gemma is expecting much less because I pulled that silly dangly loose tooth out whilst promising to just have a look. You see I’m not just the tooth fairy but the resident dentist too!

What is this life…

if full of care we have no time to stand and stare. This is still one of my favourite poems even after all these years.

The last seven days have been a really good time to reflect and be thankful for all my many blessings. There are many things I long for but for now this is where I find myself miles from the place of my birth. It’s the hardest thing to explain to people who’ve never left their country just how difficult it is to adjust in a new country. Yes, you’re right we do choose to up sticks and leave though I do take every opportunity to remind my dear husband that if it wasn’t for the love I have for him I wouldn’t have made this choice on my own! Packing up your life and leaving for distant shores always seems so romantic and adventurous to the ones waving you off.

It’s hard to believe we’ve been in the UK for just over five years now. I can’t believe I’ve lasted this long! It’s been an absolute roller-coaster of emotions. After each bout of homesickness I give myself a massive pat on the back when I realise I haven’t returned. At this moment in time I feel marginally qualified to give the misguided newbies a few tools to help them through the rough patches after what seemed like a good idea at the time.

I spent a couple of days with my aunt this past week and realised that you just can’t put a physical value on the importance of family. Spending time with family reminds you that you belong and that is enough to give you strength to carry on when you’re in doubt about so many things.

So, I’ve taken the time to stand and stare and I feel somewhat revived and ready to go on and face more challenges because there’s no shortage of opportunities to learn and grow and of course it’s a sure sign that I’m alive and well!
Go on…take the time to stand and stare.

Are you Traffick Proof?

Today is National Human trafficking Awareness Day. The statistics for modern day slavery are quite alarming and estimated to be close to 30million. It takes place in every city in every country across the world.
Do you know the signs?

As a parent raising children in this age of technology and accessibility the need to empower them with tools not just for childhood but life is a necessity. Education and age appropriate information is the key.

This war on modern day slavery can be won in our lifetime. What will you be doing to end it?
Become an ambassador for justice by finding ways to join the fight.

I’m Traffick Proof! Are you?

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